Who is leading? Who are you helping?

No, Ma’am, I Am by Ron White

As much as I hesitate to reinforce the Texas stereotype, you will often find me with a cowboy hat and boots dancing around the sawdust covered floors of Fort Worth, Texas, to the tunes of country music. I once asked a woman to dance with me and we had taken no more than three steps when it was obvious that she was leading. I gently attempted to take the lead several times and it was like a wrestling match. She would not yield control of the rhythm. It was a stilted and awkward promenade.

I then lowered my head to her ear and questioned, “Who is running this show?”

Instantly, her off-the-cuff reply was, “I am.”

My attention then went from leaning in to her ear to looking directly in her eyes as our feet motored around the sea of cowboy hats. My matter of fact statement was, “No, ma’am, I am.”

We had a standoff of eye contact that seemed to last for minutes, yet could not have been longer than two or three seconds. Finally, her body softened as she gave the signal that she was relinquishing control and smiled as she uttered, “Okay.”

Within an instant of the leadership being identified, the wrestling match turned into a dance that would win any competition. I spun her, twirled her and our feet made their way across the floor as if we were one—in sync and tied by an invisible bond.

What made the difference? Simple. It was clarification of leadership.

Make no mistake about it, leadership is not about rank. It is about role. My effort to dictate the pace, rhythm and moves in our dance was not about control or power. It was solely based upon role and the roles had been altered and resulted in a twisted, stilted dance.

In the corporate world, when an office is not dancing in sync the trouble often can easily be traced back to a leadership issue. When roles are not established and there’s a power struggle, the unit runs as smoothly as an automobile with a flat tire. This is not only true of dancing and the corporate world, but also you in personal life. My suggestion here is not that you are to always be the one directing the traffic of life. The suggestion is that you should clearly know your role.

If your role is to follow, then follow. If your role is to lead, then make sure that you firmly and gently make sure your leadership is certain. The next question is: How do you establish leadership and your role? You do it through stating the objectives of everyone in the office. It is about clarification of roles. Someone needs to be designated to answer the phones, shuffle the papers to the correct bins and process orders. Another must fulfill product orders and arrange meetings. These are not ranks; they are roles.

When the roles are not clarified, the wrong individual can often be found barking orders or failing to complete their mission. This is also often the stage when someone who has the role of processing orders can get discouraged because they feel they are a natural leader and their talents are not being utilized. Make no mistake; leadership cannot be assigned by title. The order processor who is always on time, refrains from gossip, smiles in the midst of storms and serves others has established themselves as a leader, if not in role, then in attitude and respect.

If you wish for your office, home or dance to move in perfect rhythm and find it to be a struggle, ask yourself if the roles are clearly defined and being acted upon.

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About lywirelessrepnc

Just a country boy trying to help (those who want to pay their college tuition or student loans) by sharing how to get unlimited wireless service with the bonus of free service and cash flow. I will help all my associates be better marketing and social media users.
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